Thursday, March 16, 2006
The magical moment is lost.
I've never loathed an intrusion from a good friend this much. It feels wrong now. Everything's all wrong.
I feel heavy. Human again. Disappointment? No, it goes beyond that. Dejection, failure, utter depression. More than all that.
Now I'm mortal again, and it sucks.
Immortality is such a far fetched concept. Yet for an indeterminate amount of time then, I had shared in that wonderful feeling.
Being brought back to earth hardly seems gratifying after such a high.
How long before I find it again? Can I even find that state again? Can I even hope to be as attuned to that rhythm as I was earlier? It feels all wrong. I feel all wrong. It wasn't supposed to be like this.
I need to go. I'm trying not to cry, but it's so hard...
How can anyone understand this pain of mine?
]
I've never loathed an intrusion from a good friend this much. It feels wrong now. Everything's all wrong.
I feel heavy. Human again. Disappointment? No, it goes beyond that. Dejection, failure, utter depression. More than all that.
Now I'm mortal again, and it sucks.
Immortality is such a far fetched concept. Yet for an indeterminate amount of time then, I had shared in that wonderful feeling.
Being brought back to earth hardly seems gratifying after such a high.
How long before I find it again? Can I even find that state again? Can I even hope to be as attuned to that rhythm as I was earlier? It feels all wrong. I feel all wrong. It wasn't supposed to be like this.
I need to go. I'm trying not to cry, but it's so hard...
How can anyone understand this pain of mine?
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