Friday, May 12, 2006
I...suddenly felt loved.
What brought on the sudden reaction, you may ask? Well, I just checked my account at FFnet, and realised that 5 people put me on author alert. FIVE. And that means a lot to me.
As you probably know, my self-esteem has never been the most unshakable. In fact, it's rather fragile. So I do like constant reassurance that I don't suck. Haha.
Of course, some authors have like hundreds of people putting them on author alert. Me, I only have five, but five is still better than none. Tis a good start for someone who is as non-updating as me. Hehe.
Just received a review too for Before The Light, and it really touched me. So I'm going to start writing again because I had been getting dejected from the total lack of reviews. Authors do need some recognition and affirmation of that ability, and I am human too you know. I need a bit of confidence. Scratch that, make it a lot.
Haha. Just came back not too long ago from watching the school play put on by the drama club. It was pretty good. I was suitably entertained. Well, sort of. The first production was supposed to be sad and dramatic and stuff, but I guess the whole theme of war and what it does to people has been done to death, so I pretty much knew everything they were trying to convey. The acting was pretty ok though, couple of flubs here and there, but hey, it's good for an amateur production. And Vicks, you rock. XD
Second production was pretty darn funny. I was hugely amused by the whole bitching back and forth between Helen and Agnes. Great lines delivered there. Lots of symbolism (as in the first one too).
I spent a lot of time in both productions thinking about symbols and stuff and effect and all that other literary nonsense. Like I said many times before, Literature is a full time occupation. It's becoming an occupational hazard. We start analyzing anything and everything.
For example, I found it significant that Agnes repeats an exchange with Beatrice from the opening towards the middle of the play. Something about the fact that "there are always deeper meanings underneath the surface" etc etc, and it basically brings out the fact that despite the seeming split in the family, there ARE deeper meanings we can coax out of the somewhat antagonistic relationships the sisters (mostly Helen and Agnes) have. Haha. Thinking like a true Lit student again. Dramatic irony? Maybe.
Oh, and the knives falling off the counter when they were rushing Jeffery to the hospital? Juxtatposed against the background knowledge that before their sister Janet went into a coma, she also knocked the very same set of knives to the floor. Foreshadowing Jeffery's condition? He appeared to be expected for an extended stay in the hospital for the next scene. So yeah.
Ok, stopping the literary analysis already. Haha. I should so stop doing that.
I also came to a small realisation during the whole outing. I shall keep most of it to myself though.
But here's something I realised. One thing out of many, deeper issues.
That despite everything, under any and all circumstances, the only one who is always there and needing me is myself. And that, is going to have to be enough.
Always.
]
What brought on the sudden reaction, you may ask? Well, I just checked my account at FFnet, and realised that 5 people put me on author alert. FIVE. And that means a lot to me.
As you probably know, my self-esteem has never been the most unshakable. In fact, it's rather fragile. So I do like constant reassurance that I don't suck. Haha.
Of course, some authors have like hundreds of people putting them on author alert. Me, I only have five, but five is still better than none. Tis a good start for someone who is as non-updating as me. Hehe.
Just received a review too for Before The Light, and it really touched me. So I'm going to start writing again because I had been getting dejected from the total lack of reviews. Authors do need some recognition and affirmation of that ability, and I am human too you know. I need a bit of confidence. Scratch that, make it a lot.
Haha. Just came back not too long ago from watching the school play put on by the drama club. It was pretty good. I was suitably entertained. Well, sort of. The first production was supposed to be sad and dramatic and stuff, but I guess the whole theme of war and what it does to people has been done to death, so I pretty much knew everything they were trying to convey. The acting was pretty ok though, couple of flubs here and there, but hey, it's good for an amateur production. And Vicks, you rock. XD
Second production was pretty darn funny. I was hugely amused by the whole bitching back and forth between Helen and Agnes. Great lines delivered there. Lots of symbolism (as in the first one too).
I spent a lot of time in both productions thinking about symbols and stuff and effect and all that other literary nonsense. Like I said many times before, Literature is a full time occupation. It's becoming an occupational hazard. We start analyzing anything and everything.
For example, I found it significant that Agnes repeats an exchange with Beatrice from the opening towards the middle of the play. Something about the fact that "there are always deeper meanings underneath the surface" etc etc, and it basically brings out the fact that despite the seeming split in the family, there ARE deeper meanings we can coax out of the somewhat antagonistic relationships the sisters (mostly Helen and Agnes) have. Haha. Thinking like a true Lit student again. Dramatic irony? Maybe.
Oh, and the knives falling off the counter when they were rushing Jeffery to the hospital? Juxtatposed against the background knowledge that before their sister Janet went into a coma, she also knocked the very same set of knives to the floor. Foreshadowing Jeffery's condition? He appeared to be expected for an extended stay in the hospital for the next scene. So yeah.
Ok, stopping the literary analysis already. Haha. I should so stop doing that.
I also came to a small realisation during the whole outing. I shall keep most of it to myself though.
But here's something I realised. One thing out of many, deeper issues.
That despite everything, under any and all circumstances, the only one who is always there and needing me is myself. And that, is going to have to be enough.
Always.
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