Aeternus, Eternus

It is my most solemn duty to inform one and all of this most distressing piece of information to have come into this luminous span of existence which I am proud to say, is the story of your most humble servant, but nevertheless, has been a truly enlightening time in this period of time, a time, I must truly say, is one of devastation and creation, a deadly cycle of which the surge of humanity has come to be embroiled in, as is right and proper within the balance of nature where cause and effect come into direct play so as to perpetuate the almighty will of the universe, mother and father to us all, regardless of rank or station, for are we not all equal before the eyes of our Creator, who in His infinite wisdom has seen fit to pass the seed of knowledge to humanity, His most prized creation, and forthwith from that which your humble servant has sprung into the wellspring of life in earth's crucible, a child of creation and of love, but who has recently come into the terrible misfortune of receiving a most horrifying, a truly unnerving and unsettling piece of news, one that will shock the masses, stun them into immobility, for certes, this was truly a news of insurmountable proportions, a story which shall lay well nigh into the centuries ahead, a continuous wave of memory refreshed by every amazed recounting of its sheer size and weight, the magnitude of which would rival the best of stories throughout the ages, for surely, there could no other piece of news that could match it in any and all comparisons, such as that could top it in its very essence of its intrinsic significance, for truly, your most humble servant was...bored.


Ok that was the singularly most hilarious thing I have ever written in my life. Eddings was right, long and pompous speeches are fun! XD