Sunday, September 03, 2006
I know that if Kanai were on right now, she would tell me not to think too much into certain matters. Even Chaos, that irritating little bugger, is telling me not to make links between remotely connected dots...or completely unrelated, as it may turn out to be.
Still, I can't seem to get away from the sneaking suspicion that my whole life is playing out like a badly written soap opera, complete with cliched situations where meanings are misunderstood or when people deliberately misread connotations for the heck of it.
For it certainly seems to be that way now. I need to stop reading fanfiction perhaps. It's making me look for meanings where there might be none in real life. Sure, in fanfiction, or any fiction for that matter, close reading (argh PC!!) pays off because everything means something. Literally. Well, maybe. Sometimes I'm not even aware of the meanings of some of the things I slip into my own writing. Meh.
So, the cause of my current dilemma? One line. One. Freaking. Line.
The biggest changes in our lives stem from the smallest, most insignificant things.
And so I'm going to continue telling myself that it really doesn't mean anything, that the line doesn't refer to me in any shape or form, that the world doesn't revolve around me (yeah right we all tell ourselves that). Hopefully it really doesn't. But then again, if it does, we're both just going to ignore it and pretend that everything's perfectly fine, all the while being deathly afraid that the other will never ever think the same way about us. Sounds dreadfully familiar actually.
Excuse me while I adjourn to read some ShizNat fanfiction. It seems wholly appropriate at this point. Ja!
]
Still, I can't seem to get away from the sneaking suspicion that my whole life is playing out like a badly written soap opera, complete with cliched situations where meanings are misunderstood or when people deliberately misread connotations for the heck of it.
For it certainly seems to be that way now. I need to stop reading fanfiction perhaps. It's making me look for meanings where there might be none in real life. Sure, in fanfiction, or any fiction for that matter, close reading (argh PC!!) pays off because everything means something. Literally. Well, maybe. Sometimes I'm not even aware of the meanings of some of the things I slip into my own writing. Meh.
So, the cause of my current dilemma? One line. One. Freaking. Line.
The biggest changes in our lives stem from the smallest, most insignificant things.
And so I'm going to continue telling myself that it really doesn't mean anything, that the line doesn't refer to me in any shape or form, that the world doesn't revolve around me (yeah right we all tell ourselves that). Hopefully it really doesn't. But then again, if it does, we're both just going to ignore it and pretend that everything's perfectly fine, all the while being deathly afraid that the other will never ever think the same way about us. Sounds dreadfully familiar actually.
Excuse me while I adjourn to read some ShizNat fanfiction. It seems wholly appropriate at this point. Ja!
Comments:
Post a Comment
